Kids and Moving

Just want to update for those that follow this blog:

First, a note I wrote to some friends about what had been going on...

G took the kids for 3 nights last week. It was such a reliefe for me cuz I was sick but especially for the kids. I think they really needed it. The only issue was on Wednesday I met up with G at the dentist for S's appt. She had a rough time and was upset when she couldn't go home with me. But I had to go to work. I picked her up after I got off and she was in a much better mood.

I hadn't talked to him since until Sunday. I called to talk to him about a toddler bed my mom said she would give him for T (since he still has T in the PNP and we KNOW he has to be too big for it). We talked about when he would take the kids this week but he is supposed to move this week so he doesn't know when he can take them. T had a Spring concert Tuesday and S has one on Thursday so that messes with things. So I have no idea when/if he will take the kids this week.

We also talked about him moving and he IS moving to Mesa. It is about an hour from my house. You remember he thought we would trade off drop offs! PISH! So yesterday he was saying how he hoped we could meet halfway. Gee, just what I want, to drive a half hour out of my way before work. I don't know. We will see what happens but right now I am not open to the idea.

He also brought up the visitation schedule and said he didn't like it because one week he has the kids 1 day during the week and the next week he is supposed to have the kids for 3 days (Friday after daycare to Monday dropping them off at daycare.). He said the 1 overnight is what sucks cuz he would pick them up after daycare and then drop them off the next morning at daycare. He said that doesn't give him much time. (OK, this is so hard to explain sorry) I had to explain it was written that way because he is SUPPOSED to have a job. So he would pick them up after work and have to drop them off before work. That he can't have them on the weekend all the time because I want to be able to see them and do things with them on weekends. But if he gets a job where his days off are during the week then it wouldn't be like that and he could have them the whole day. He said with living so far away if he worked until 5 he wouldn't be able to pick them up by 6 (when daycare closes) and wouldn't be able to get them to daycare the next day and then to work on time. Well, DUH dumbshit! That is why I told you NOT to move so far away!! He is such an idiot!!! I don't even know how he would take them for a weekend. He wouldn't be able to pick them up on Friday/drop them off on Monday either. He would have to take them Sat morning to Sunday night. I just don't think he has realized that part of it. But like I told him, he is making his choices and he will have to deal with the consequenses. Unfortunately, so will the kids and I. *sigh*

OH! AND this happened a few days ago. S was telling me about helping pack her toys at ther daddy's house. She said he was getting a new place to live. And when her daddy moves she will go stay with him at the new place. She was confused and thought that meant she would STAY with him. She told me she would never come back to mommy's house and never see me again. :( I have been trying to reassure her that it just means when she visits she will "stay"/sleep at the new place but she will ALWAYS come home to mommy's house and mommy will ALWAYS be here for her. She is so confused and worried about it. I can't wait for the move to be over so she can see that things are still the same, daddy just has a new house farther away. So yea... stress.
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Since I wrote this several things have happened. G didn't end up getting the house he was going to be renting. So he told me he wouldn't be able to take the kids at all this week. Then the next day he found out the house wasn't going to sell that day. (Forclose) I called the bank to figure out what was happeneing but I didn't get many answers. They basically said that due to my bankruptsy they had to start the file over again. They would have a new sale date by the end of the week. But basically it means G has at least another month to figure out his living situation. Maybe longer.

I sent a text and asked if if he would be taking the kids this week since his "schedule cleared up". I sent him the text after T's concert. It wasn't until the next night that he answered me. I thought he would just ask to keep them that night but he didn't. And that night was a mess. I had sent him a text asking him if he wanted to take the kids out for dinner since he wasn'tplanning on an over night with them. That way they had a chance to see him more than just a few minutes at T's concert. Anyway, I will post all the texts below so you can see it all played out...

Mar 24 :1:22pm Me: The Toy Story set didn't sell at the garage sale. Want it for TJ? He's getting a toddler bed soon right?
Mar 24 2:39pm G: Sure

Mar 26 2:21pm Me: Figured out the visitation for this week yet? Do you have your address for me?
Mar 26 2:29pm G: the house fell through with misc added costs. I can do visitation next week Monday through Thursday. This week I am really not sure what would be good for the kids. I really don't see a good day since I will have to move at a moments notice and everything is packed up. let me see what the rest of the day brings.
Mar 26 6:22pm Me: Since the kids wont get to stay with you this week do you want to take them to dinner after Ts concert tomorrow so they get to spend some time with you?
Mar 26 6:36pm G: I'd like that. thank you. see you tomorrow. 
(why doesn't HE ask for/figure these things out???)
Mar 26 7:12pm G: I'd like to get S involved in donating her hair to locks of love. Would you mind doing a little research and thinking about it?
(WTF???)
Mar 26 7:12pm Me: I don't want to cut her hair. And you have to have at least 6 inches to donate.
(Which she doesn't have)
Mar 26 7:15 G: I don't want to do it right now. maybe in a year or so. I think minimum is 10".
(So why are we talking about this?!?!)

*G called and said the forcloser had been cancelled because my BK had been dismissed. I explained it hadn't been dismissed, it had been discharged. But I didn't understand why they would cxl the sale.
Mar 27 10:42am G: just got off the phone with Chase and the title company. Sale was canceled for reason other than your BK. Something about publisher information.
Mar 27 10:43pm Me: Fuck. So when will it sell??
Mar 27 10:44am G: no date established yet. Have to call back Friday.
Mar 27 10:45am Me: Just voluntarily turn it over. Then it would be done.
Mar 27 10:46am G: as soon as I have a house.
**after T's concert G took the kids to dinner at McDonalds. He said he would bring them back around 6.
Mar 27 5:53pm G: going to go feed Goliath then head to your house.
(I think this is what royally screwed my night. S didn't want to leave his house. I don't know why he didn't just decide to keep them for the night. Then when they got home she had the tantrum from hell. *sigh*)
Mar 27 6:39pm G: on our way. it took a while to get S calm enough to get in the car.
(they made it hime at 7. 7 is bedtime. I immediatly tried getting them into jammies and into bed. Fianlly I left S crying on the couch so I could at least get T down. My next text is when I FINALLY got her down by bribing her with sleeping in my bed.)
Mar 27 7:49pm Me: so with the house deadline extended did you want to take them for a night this week?

Mar 28 7:52pm G: I have been trying to figure out a way to have the kids this week. I can take them Thursday night after the Spring Sing to Friday afternoon. Would that work for you? Ill make it an adventure out of camping in a house for them. Almost everything is packed I have a request in on another house but the guy is really slow to respond. Hopefully I'll be moving this weekend.
(It bothers me that he makes it sound like he is doing me a favor by taking them. And honestly I think it is a horrible idea for them to go that night because they have a hard time going to bed at his house anyway. But now they are going to leave the concert, a concert that doesn't even start until 1/2 hour before their bedtime, and take them to his place. At my place I know I could get them home and in bed right away. But they probably wont get to bed until after 10 with him. But I want them to see him and have some time with him so what choice do I have??)
Mar 28 7:58pm Me: Whatever you want to do. Just let me know if I should pack clothes.
Mar 28 8:02pm G: pack clothes. I'll take them home after the spring sing and bring them back friday.
Mar 28 8:11pm Me: was just thinking and want to make sure to tell you I plan to take the kids out to dinner before the concert so don't worry about dinner. (since the concert isn't until 630)
Mar 28 8:11pm G: ok thanks for the heads up.

So I had to coax him into dinner. Then into a night with them. I am so tired of working out him seeing the kids. And I would stop but then I never know what is going on or how to plan my life. He will wait until the night before and then ask to have them. And I just can't live like that. I WISH we could have a normal schedule that stayed the same EVERY week!! I know the kids would REALLY benefit from this as well. Especailly S. I keep thinking as soon as XXXX happens things will regulate. But here I am still waiting for that to happen.